"Hey, Coach...pop the clutch; I'll keep pushing...
It's gotta start sooner or later!"

- Derek

"Hmmm, I wonder if Biakabutuka
can hold on to this one."

- Steve Payseur

"This hog's too big for that grill."

- Charles Brown

"Coach Jones and Leroy put in countless hours,
blood, sweat and tears practing for the
National Gas Championships."

- Johnny Destiny

"It's the new football-themed, virtual pinball
game. Five dollars for five balls."

- Jimmy Barbee

"...and one time, at football camp..."

- Blackjack Bright

"Fumble!!!!!!!!"

- Brad Scott